fill my heart with fire

He kept going, thinking of the children now and how they felt about the situation. There was never a single moment when Elettra did not see her children happy. Of course, the children argued amongst one another in competition, rallied against Guiness and gave Skana a hard time, but all and all they showed nothing but happiness and pride in themselves, each other, the home which they lived and of course, their mother. She shakes her head. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"They haven't even asked." Not even a hint of a father, of if they had even needed one to be conceived into what they were now. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"Sometimes I think they never will." And she didn't care... Taking a deep breath, her eyes search him through this darkness in the same manner which he did with her. Somehow, she felt a tension here, something which she could not place her paw on. She wondered of his questions, wondered how he felt of her now that he knew the answers, if it as what he had wanted to hear... <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"Do you still love me?" The question was so very sudden that it had even shocked herself. He had said it once, that he loved her, loved, though was still uncertain of it's meaning to this very day. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"Is this what you want?" It was Winter and with Spring came a finality. A decision which would shift and mold his life forever. He had promised his devotion to her, his care and willingness, if nothing else in the world, to be at her side and make her happy, to trust him. She had. She did. And now all she wanted to know is if her opening up to him was worth the effort after all.

(This post was last modified: Dec 30, 2013, 08:04 AM by Elettra.)

♫ Joe Gil - Leave or Stay

She revealed to him that neither Asriel, Skoll nor Morganna had ever asked about their father; only then did it occur to Angier that the trio had possibly never even heard of or even uttered the word. Dad. Daddy. Father. All they had ever known - and he, too should have known, being Skoll's diction teacher and all during those first few months - was "Mama" and "Mother." It stung a bit as he thought of Trisden and Hocus and even Fenru, Corinna's fireball of a son, but in those three examples, he realized that perhaps it had been for the best. Hell, even without their father around, he, Skana and Guinness were always on their feet. Kiche had merely been out of sight, out of mind. So long as Kiche stayed out of their lives, maybe, the young princess and the princess were capable of keeping both chips on each of their shoulders.

If he, Angier Lyall, left... Maybe it wouldn't be so bad... aside from whatever guilt sprung up when his need to travel gave out at last. Again, he sniffled, his thoughts flying about as he hastily tried to organize and prioritize them again until it became clear: his mind wanted the thrill of the mountainside and the endless reaches of the meadows but his heart - oh, his heart - cried for him to be sensible and consider all that was at stake.

He had been given everything to lose since he first set foot on Elettra's territory, even more so when he rose to leadership alongside the Archer matriarch herself. He could not just let everything go now... Not now... not ever.

When the silence had crept back between them, he kept quiet. His train of thought had been derailed; Elettra was right to think that her present children would probably never ask. Kiche was the past and that statement alone had somehow transitioned so smoothly into the next subject of interest that it felt as though it had been expected and unexpected all at once.

"Do you still love me?"

His brows rose and he peered at her incredulously. The beating organ in his chest ached and pulsed in an anguished rhythm. "Is this what you want?" Upon first impression the tone in her voice easily had him wanting to reach out and console her further; on a second thought, he steeled himself before finally letting everything out. "Elettra," he breathed.

"I..." his head tilted to one side and then the other, scrambling to assemble the right words and compose it all in the right tone. "Yes," he murmured, as though he were afraid the other Ridge wolves were nearby to hear his every word. "This... This is more than I could 'ave ever hoped for." Though the fear still kept its grip on ever muscle in his limbs - the worry that he, like the rest of the fathers he knew, would leave his partner - he did his best to keep it at bay. It left him to gaze at her both in relief and a kind of sadness that was only hinted at by how his ears slightly rotated back.

"I do love you," he asserted, a pained smile tugging at his ivory maw. "I had, I have, I... I still do." He swallowed hard, "All this time... I... I thought I'd ne'er find you." It felt as though a sharp stick was being driven into his ribs; it was taking everything he had to keep himself from inching forward and burying his face in her dark shoulder. "You're all I could 'ave ever asked for. You have given me everything I have e'er wanted an' more..." His muzzle dipped downward. "I am still so afraid," he whispered in admittance, his eyes staring down at both of their paws in the snow. "I want so much to make you 'appy... I'm afraid I'll be--" the whiskers above his eyes quivered until the light spots on his face momentarily touched, "--like Borden, like Kiche... Alexander... Indru... I couldn't... I would die if I ever found myself apart from you."

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It had dawned on Elettra with these topics this black day that perhaps her children, in truth, would never ask about their father and should they, it would only be of mere curiosity. @Asriel and Skoll had shown every sign of protection and devotion towards @Morganna, insuring her safety and happiness most of all along the side of their mother. Certainly this was due to their upbringing, raised by a single ruling, singular parent and powerful woman. Perhaps it was that they did not need a father. They were far too happy, too healthy and too proud without one. Where as some pups had suffered after loosing their father's support, the Willow Ridge children had been raised to deal without. Alas, they did not feel the pain of missing a father, for it was something they never had in the first place. Now there was a male at Elettra's side. Now there was a male for her children to look up to in a manner they looked up to Guiness and Skana, and more... She did not know their true feelings of Angier and could only wonder what questions might stir should the Leading pair have children of their own... Would they want their father then? Would they be jealous of their younger siblings? Would her new children be so very different, that they were doomed to failure should Angier disappear as well? Maybe Elettra Archer had done well by her children by them not having a father... It was, without a doubt, that Elettra had worries as well, though kept them to tightly locked away whilst Angier revealed his own. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"Overwhelming, is it?" She spoke this question, though more as a statement, really. She could assume this, understand it, though would never find herself on level with him. She was born in a large pack, who ruled a vast land. She was the Leader's daughter, a royal birthing. Everything was expected of her and she was used to the weight on her shoulders. It seemed that Angier was not so much used to this, who she met living as a rogue in the shadow of his brother. Though it was something he had always wanted, perhaps he had never thought to have it and now that he did... A pack. Pups that looked up to him. Leadership. A woman that he could call his own. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"They all left. All of them and more..." Koda had left Nina to herself and like Jaysyek before her, a son had fallen. Unknowingly, Narime's mate had now went up and missing too, not to mention other father's along the Lore not worth of such a title. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"I think your difference will make the difference. Your fear will be your focus." She breaths in deep, taking her own words as best to heart that she could. She wanted this to be true but if not...well, she had done well to care for her children on her own thus far... <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"You will not leave me." She states, matter-of-factly. <b style="font-family:georgia; font-size:11px; color:#ffffff;">"...Or you will die." She twists the very words he spoke to her manipulation, a small smirk forming at the corners of her lips as a small laughter takes her, stirring the chill in the air.

<3 Kudos and thanks for putting up with Angier's "cold feet." Shall we wrap up here?

He let out an airy sigh, the sound of it exiting his jowls only partially relieving him of the anxiety that still fluttered about in his chest. Her words at first did little to console him but the sentiments that came after she had confirmed that even more parents had left their families rekindled the confidence that lay in pieces beneath the fire that fueled his trepidation. "I think your difference will make the difference," she reassured him, "your fear will be your focus." His ears cautiously came back up, slowly as though there were some invisible electric current humming just above his head. Her breathing seemed to be the sound that he had needed to hear; one deep breath and he also let both of his shoulders relax. His whole body posture sank down a few inches and he cracked a smile when she uttered to him:

"You will not leave me... Or you will die."

A part of him wanted to chuckle, to laugh, to bow down, and worship her as he seemingly always had. She was right. She was always right. He tensed his jaw, trying hard to contain the tickled grin on his snout, but then... she laughed. It sounded like bells in his ears; never in Angier Lyall's life had he ever heard such a youthful, feminine and equally womanly sound. Jaysyek had rarely spoken to him, Skylah had seemed girlish, his young nieces had only ever tittered amongst themselves and growled at him... Vlarindara Windrunner and everyone else who had failed to come to mind had, at long last, been forgotten... even the smallest of Elettra Archer's smirks and chuckles, in all her cunning and designing ways, were by far his favorite. Just like that, his worries temporarily went away.

"I would," he justified, casting her a now grateful smile. Whether he met his end by the emotional weight of all the guilt and blame or delivered to Death, himself, by the Dark Lady's own bite, it would be true. Ever so carefully he leaned towards her so that the wisps of their winter pelts on each of their shoulders just barely touched then, just as he had always done, angled his head to touch his nose to her off-white chin. "I'm yours," he whispered through the blackness, lightly nuzzling her before pulling away. "Nothing will ever change that."

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Wrapping works well! This was a nice moment before all the 'death and drama'.

Through the darkness she had but to hear his breath and the shifting of his weight, whatever sighs he might have made under parted lips. The darkness was deafening, frightening, not being able to see the paws at your feet, not being able to use one of your senses properly. Her ears remained high, twisting and twitching to each and every sound - all and only by Angier, for the world had seemed to stop everywhere else. Everything was silent, savor what words they passed amongst one another. Her head turned then to him and she would vaguely see his teeth as a smile cut his expression. His words comfort her, comfort her because not only did she believe them, but the mood in Angier seemed to change, that perhaps her words did well to comfort him as well. He shifts, the hairs along their shoulders brushing and the touch of his muzzle meets the bottom of her chin. She is silent though she smiles still and accepting of his touch, she leans further into his direction, allowing their once brushing hairs now come into full contact as she presses to his broad shoulder. A deep breath and only this, as she allows herself to find some sort of comfort in this darkness and silence at the side of Angier Lyall.